Posted by: distributorcap | October 24, 2009

Discovered at Schwab’s

If it worked for Lana Turner….

When she was a law student, Orly Taitz skipped the class “frivoulous lawsuits” one afternoon and headed to Schwab’s Pharmacy to buy a cup of tea. While sitting at the counter, she was spotted by the obese radio show host Rushell B. DeLimbaugh. DeLimbaugh was attracted to her inability to utter one audible word in the English language and her complete lack of any intelligence. She referred her to the actor/comedian/fear-monger Dick Cheney. Cheney’s subversive agency immediately signed her on and cast her in her first film.

Capt. Limbaugh and his space crew (Diaper Dave, Crybaby Beck, and John Boner) crash land on the planet Analwart and are captured. They learn the planet is under the dictatorship of cruel Queen Birther (Zsorly Zsorly Taitz), a unintelligible woman who has banished Kenyans from the planet. In the palace, the astronauts are aided by a moronic quitter named Palin and her friends Lizard, Malkin, and Batshitcrazy Michele. The women long for the “love” of Kenyans again and plot to overthrow the evil Queen. When Limbaugh has the opportunity to remove the Queen’s mask, he discovers she has been horribly disfigured by radiation burns caused by global warming.

The Birthers, led by Orly Taitz ride to the rescue of the oppressed wingnuts, by protesting the “Kenyan born president.” Simultaneously, teabaggers march on Washington demanding no change in health care. When they emerge victorious, the teabaggers celebrate in the streets, and then begin dropping like flies when they realize cannot get any affordable health care for themselves. The film cuts to the courtroom where the birthers are attempting to disenfranchise the first black president. The film concludes with a coronation of the country’s the new leaders – Orly Taitz, Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin and Rush Limbaugh. The final frame shows the oppressed masses worshipping the mythical god Reagan and while the four leaders are downing Mai Tais. The final title rhetorically asks: “Dare we dream of a golden day when the bestial GOP shall rule no more?

B!eck and his band of lunatic relatives are living well off the land in the Kenyan Desert. They are happy because the GOP gods have provided plenty of everything to the white Christians, and nothing to anyone who isn’t in their tribe. One day, a Tetley teabag is thrown out of an B-52 bomber and falls to earth unbroken. Initially, this strange artifact seems to be another boon from the GOP —-B!eck’s people find many uses for it. But unlike anything that they have had before, there is only one teabag to go around. This exposes the tribe to a hitherto unknown carnal phenomenon called teabagging, and they soon find themselves spreading lies, jealousy, envy, anger, and hatred (as well as their legs).

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Responses

  1. Give Orly a break. Let's not forget she's also a dentist, so maybe she over used pharmaceutical cocaine and nitrous oxide.

  2. If only we could deport Orly.Ole!

  3. With a cast of several!As to Orly, methinks she makes an excellent case for totally closed borders. She is not a member of MY America…I want it back.When is this premiering?

  4. While this nation has seemed to have fallen into a bucket full of crazy shit, mixed with a high concentration of stupidity the birthers never really had a chance to get Obama kicked out of office. But I can't help but imagine what would have happened if they did and the results would have made the Civil War pale in comparison.

  5. add those to the list of movies that make you cry.

  6. The GOP acts more and more desperate, yet they keep bragging how they will win big in 2010. It just doesn't fit.

  7. Birther of a Nation syncronicity

  8. Does anyone know what institution awarded a JD to Ms. Taitz? Was it the same institution that awarded her a D.D.S.? They must be so proud of this alum.Further, I find it difficult to believe she passed a bar exam anywhere.

  9. Hey, anon…I am also thinking she needs to produce her birth certificate…I mean she just sounds way too foreign to me.

  10. Let's deport her anyway, I mean, it may be against the law, but when did that stop that crowd that used to be in the White House.Maybe a stint in Dentists Whithout Borders would help.Good Post as alwats and yes nonnie it is now On my klist of movies that will make me cry.

  11. Speaking of "frivolous" lawsuits,one of your ardent supporters seems to think this one was too…but it wasn't:TEXTMiss you guys, but I just cannot be here with him around.Maggie

  12. Hi Cap;Seems that my fan club is following me around and leaving libel with everyone I know.I have never met her in person and really have no idea why she continues this.

  13. C'mon gimme a break. Robert Roels Ichabod now admits that the Baja Nomads are his"associates", when before he claimed they were a "gang."These are some of his friends:Mindy Selinger aka Jeans on the Nomads, loves Rush Limbaugh.Wiley or Comitan on the Nomads was an original Kerry swiftboater.The Gull on the Nomads is so far to the right GOP he makes Sarah Palin look like a saint.These, and many more are staunch degraders of Obama, Mike Moore, Al Gore, etc.If you don't belive me, and I'm not pushing my site, look at the comments they start and the threads they start about me, their intent is to make me go away. I simply respond in kind.These are TROLLS, they do not want anyone to know what the conditions are really like here, because Baja is their little gold mine. Roels has a myriad of different sites and personas, just recently he had one claiming to live in San Diego and he was trying to sell vacation trips to San Diego and Baja.He is a con artist, he and this entire group supported what could have been one of the most environmentally degrading developments here, the Trump Towers, along with other Baja sites(Baja.com) which are set up specifically to sell real estate. The Baja Trump Towers turned out to be one of the biggest pyramid schemes ever, with people losing millions of dollars, yet these groups supported it.I guess if you like trolls and nazis, he is just your cup of tea.Maggie

  14. Please view this, also on his ICHABOD site once again he claims he knows nothing of the Baja Nomads yet here he knows them and Mindy Selinger.One more thing, Mindy Selinger and Bajabound of the Baja Nomads think anyone who was in opposition to George Bush are "terrorists".Yes, I did comment on his ridiculous statement and I said I thought that someone needs to stick a five pound bag of zinc phosphide up his ass:Please post this, please, and you can see for yourselves:TEXTFor your information there are alot of US government employees living here.Thxs,Maggie

  15. Was the $20K fine enough? Maybe when Taitz becomes a real lawyer she will appreciate what just happened. I wonder if she is a mail order bride, just like her law degree? She is perfect reporter material for “Fake News”, where unfounded rumors and innuendo reign supreme , unlike a our US courts of law, where you need to present documented facts, not half baked lies (prepare for more failures). When flies get too close to the lights they get burned, Taitz just got burned, thing is, like a fly she will continue, no end in sight. Poor little Birthers they are haters not debaters.A lawyer, dentist, realtor and black belt, wow I must say a JACK of all trades master of none.

  16. Sorry, but more information for you: these are the Baja Nomads which Robert Roels/Ichabod defends and wants these and me banned from the internet.On the second link, and both of these are from three years ago, you can see Roels actually comments, but "pjcnlv" comment is the one he used on his most recent distorted version of our lawsuit from twenty years ago:TEXTHere is where Roels and pjcnlv show up:TEXTI will never take these down, never. He is trying to intimidate me, that is what he has been doing for THREE YEARS and it is not going to happen.And that's what Robert Roels/Ichabod is all about, BTW his threats are LUDICROUS. No way is he going to have me banned from the internets, what a bunch of crap just like everything else he says.He is a nazi and now finally you all know it. I tried to tell you before but you wouldn't listen.Thxs,Maggie

  17. Hi Cap;This is not the place for this, but it appears that this ICHABOD character is a real low life slime bag on about an equal level as a Saddam or Hitler or Stalin or George W with a little of Cheney thrown in.Either that or menopause has affected the truth area of the brain just a little 🙂

  18. Hi Cap, By the way, seeing as you live in the Big Apple, would you mind dropping in at the Donald's place for me and picking up a check, its a couple or three years past due.If he kicks you out because he never heard of me, at least you'll have had the opportunity of meeting a celebrity. :)Maybe you can get a good deal on a quad, so I can join my heroes the Baja Nomads. Now I'll have to go find a nice tattoo parlor so I can get a Nazi insignia tattooed on my derriere and the picture will almost be complete. If I miss anything I'll let you know.Thank You for your help. 🙂

  19. Ha! Birther of a Nation! Love it! :DThat's pretty rich on multiple levels.I recall watching Birth of a Nation for a class in grad school. I'd never seen it before. The portrayal of post-war African-American state legislators as monkey-like sub-humans (white actors in black face, of course) is revolting.


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